Middle America's Worldview

It seems no sleeping in for me for the weekend. I was awakened Saturday by work (the continued on-call luck) to a non-issue. Since I was up early anyway, I decided it would be best for me to grab my supplies for a home project. We had the A.C. fixed Friday night. It appears we were 2 lbs shy of freon. Fortunately, and blessedly, we have cool air again. I knew it was too hot in this bloody house. In the continued interest of keeping the 3 mutts (dogs) off the A.C. unit outside, I wanted to build a wall around it.

I ran to Lowes for the supplies, it took a bit to find the necessary items. To make things simple, for a simpleton like me, I grabbed some 2x4's, nails and some lattice work. The idea would be to keep it simple, but efficient.

Since, I was to go out, prior of the kids waking up, how about grabbing some donuts, and that pool we been talking about. This is my wife suggesting a more efficient run for me.

I grabbed the stuff at Lowes and managed to fit the 4x8 lattice work in and 2x4's within our van. I would be bopped in the back of the head but oh well.

I then proceeded to Walmart on Rogers street. No pool. I then went to the one on Zero street. Yes, as unreal as it seems, this area can support 2 super center Walmarts and 2 smaller ones. I had a girl find the requested pool. As usual it was someone not within the dept area and the items were located somewhere else. It was by hardware none-the-less. So I am looking at this behemoth of a box, thinking, ok, it will surely fit with all the other wood in there.

The nice lady found me a cart in order for us to roll or push it onto, as opposed to lifting it on the regular shopping cart. Since she was so nice, I decided to do the most of the lifting and pushing onto the metal cart. There went one nut, busted. But I restrained the grimace, a bit.

I proceeded up to the counter where everyone was 4-5 people lined back. I readily found the old lady cash registar with the equally old lady counting her pennies for her supplies. Once I finally was able to pay out, I was asked if I needed assistance. Looking at the "2 man lift" on the box that reached my head, I replied "Yes, please". I waited for about 10 minutes before the group of guys about 6 feet away was done drawing straws.

The poor loser of the straw drawing followed me out to the van. After, I removed the lattice and boards, we began to put the item in the back of the van. Yes, I removed the back seat before leaving the house. Rather than lifting it, he simple began pushing it over into the van. After some muscle and the second nut (mine) busted, it was in. We nimbly dodged the metal cart from hitting us as it flipped during our course of action.

The kid then took the cart and ran off. I replaced the wood and climbed in. The lattice found its way closer to the back of my head. I then had to find the donut shop on the way home. This was accomplished readily enough as it was close to the store.

After grabbing a box of donuts, I proceeded home. I had a good view of the sky as the backend raised the front pretty good. If it was Herbie the love bug, I am sure the sentence from him would be "Get that fat bit** off my end." But it wasn't, so I just imagined it as I proceed home.

I made it there with the axle still surviving.

I have to say at this point, I was able to get my project done yesterday, but the pool box remains in the van.